Leaning into the Wait

Last week I posted about change. My goodness, we love it and hate it all at the same time, but what happens when we are ready for things to change, but they're not. What do we do in the wait?

As I am trying my hardest not to rush this season of my life - it's fun and exciting, has its challenges, but comes with just-about-all a girl could wish for - yet there's still a part of me that is ready to move onto the next thing.

Have you been there? If I could only make it through this day. Or if only that sweet baby could talk or walk already. If only I could move into that new home or get married or have children, or get a new job, new car, new pay raise, or get to Friday, if only I could get a new ______ or to the next _____. If only.  

If only we didn't wish our life away.  

Waiting is part of life! Just as much as change is, so is waiting. 

When we start wishing ourselves to the next season (or even to the end of the week!), we begin missing things. We miss the joy. We miss moments and laughter or memories and lessons. We miss the opportunity that's only found in the "right now" in these circumstances or this situation.  

If we aren't careful our beautiful, bright world will quickly become dull because of all that wishin' and wonderin'. By all means, dream. Dream of the days, the sweet life and the goals, but let's not miss what is right in front of us right now. 

Lord, remind us that this season of life has purpose. It's special and put here for a reason. May we not get in too big of a hurry that miss the opportunity to stop and enjoy today.

Let's pledge to stand strong, be present and take it all in during this season of life because the next one will be here before we know it!

xoxo

Jes

“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.” Matthew‬ ‭6:34‬ ‭(NLT)‬‬ 

“Have you never heard? Have you never understood? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” Isaiah‬ ‭40:28-31‬ ‭(NLT‬‬)

Dear Change, We Don't Always Love You.

Why is change so hard?

May I let that question sit with you for a minute? Tomorrow I’ll have the opportunity to speak to a group of women at the Leadership Education Seminar. My topic is “Turnover & Transition” an eloquent title defined by change as we ask, “How do we lead through the change?”.  

Change is all around us. It’s in our personal life, a new season of life, at home or in the workplace, it’s in our relationships and community; it’s happening. Kids are taking their first steps, friends moving into new homes, graduates are starting college, parents are aging and friends are getting married and/or having babies. As I’ve heard them say in the South, “we’re all in the thick of it together.”

Whether it’s anticipated or unexpected, it’s the new. And we make the choice to either embrace it or resist it. What will you do? What’s changing in your life? What do you wish you could or could not change?

Most of the time my head screams embrace it, but my heart whispers wait, don’t. Other times, I can’t wait for things to change. (I’ll talk more about living in the “wait” in my next post.) Regardless of how the change comes, I’m praying that we’ll have the courage to welcome it. We want to be compassionate about the new, lean into the growth and opportunity with a smile and continue to remember that each season has a reason and a purpose.

Welcome, my friend. Change and new adventure awaits. What will you chose to do with it?

xoxo
Jes

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6

If we're in a season of change, may we simply readjust our sails.  

Are We the Change?

Reading headline after headline in today's newspaper, my heart begins to ache. Do we ever report good news? There's so much going on in the world today. Chaos, destruction, fear, prejudice, and division is splattered all over the media - from reading about the slain officers in Dallas, to the tragic destruction in France and Orlando, my heart easily becomes overwhelmed. If the world is like this now - what is it going to be like when my kids grow up? (We still have some time, but you see what I mean?!) 

So what can we do? It's a big world and sometimes it doesn't feel as if I can really make a difference. This is large scale stuff. And I'm only one person. Only one person without a tv show, big platform or powerful campaign. One person with a blog at best - maybe -reaches a hundred people on a really good week.

With that small sphere of influence, what can I do, what can you do to make a difference in a big world?
Be the change that we want to see.  

We can be kind. We can be generous. We can treat others with respect. We can choose kindness over harsh, critical words. We can chose to see the best in someone. We can have compassion. We can forgive. We can serve. We can volunteer. We can love. We can pray. We can choose hope and faith over despair and discouragement. 

"Let us not become weary in doing what is good, for at the proper time, we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have the opportunity, let us do good to all people. Galatians 6:9

We get to choose and help write the headlines of our lives. Maybe we can't create world peace overnight, but we can choose to serve and love our neighbors. We can make a choice to do the next right thing. And little by little, we create change. 

Officer Hopps from Walt Disney's new movie Zootopia said it best in her final graduation speech, "When I was a kid I thought Zooptopia was this perfect place. Where everyone got along and anyone could be anything. Turns out real life is a little bit more complicated than a slogan on a bumper sticker. Real life is messy. We all have limitations. We all make mistakes. Which means, hey, glass half full, we all have a lot in common. And the more we try to understand one another, the more exceptional each of us will be. But we have to try. So no matter what type of animal you are. From the biggest elephant to our first fox - I implore you, try. Try to make the world a better place. Look inside of yourself and recognize that change starts with you. It starts with me. It starts with all of us."

Yes, it starts with us. In Ghandi's famous pinned words, "Be the change that you wish to see in the world." There's no accident that you and I are here in this time in history.  Let's do our part. 

xoxo
Jes

P.S. So your neighbor is a jerk? Be kind today. Yes, it may hurt, but try. Cookies, flowers, something to begin a change of kindness. Look around your world. What can you do today to make a difference?

“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And Jesus said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself." Matthew 22: 36-39

"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. All over all these virtues, put on love, which binds them together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts." Colossians 3:12-15a

Breaking up with Perfection

It's official. I'm calling it quits with perfectionism. Perfect(ism) and I have had a relationship go on just a little too long and it's finally time to break up.  

As a first-born and big sister boss of two brothers, striving for perfection has been in my world many years. I've wanted things to go my way and be nice and tidy, and perfect as it should be. Cheerleading captain - check. High school honors - check. Full college scholarship - check. Study abroad - check. Cool first job - check. Cute guy - check. Adorable house near the beach - check. Perfection has been this elusive, ideal version of myself and my world that I've been constantly chasing for years, that is, until things didn't go the way I had planned. My white-picket fence, southern story-book life was turned upside down and has never quite been the same since. Yet, as much as I know life isn't perfect, I still want it to be. 

As I want things to go the way I planned and had hoped them to be reality sets in again - my world, your world, our world and our people aren't perfect...and neither are we! So we get let down and disappointed, we burn the cookies, stain the dress, knock over the glass or miss the cue...and sometimes when those things don't go as planned our feelings get hurt and hearts get broken. 

Each unperfect [marred] expectation leaves a little mark of disappointment, discouragement, and discontentment on my heart. It can easily end up hurting my relationships, friendships and teammates; my things (vacations, projects and parties), and my hopes and my dreams. When things don't turn out exactly how I wanted, I can find myself not enjoying the blessing of opportunity that I do have right in front of me. 

We won't ever be perfect this side of heaven. We're banged up, fearfully and wonderfully made, imperfect people trying to be perfect, trying to make perfect and we are wearing ourselves out! 

So in the break-up (and you're welcome to join me!), I'm learning to trade in perfection for excellence. 

Whoa. What? 

Hear me out: Excellence is a talent or quality that is unusually good and surpasses ordinary standards. Wikipedia goes on to say that excellence is a moving target that can be pursued with actions of integrity. Perfection on the other hand is something of absolute completeness and flawlessness, correct in every detail. 

While I can't always do things perfectly every single time, but I can commit to doing them with excellence each time. Doing something extremely well, with integrity and my best might gives way for the opportunity to let my perfect, not-so-perfect expectations off the hook. With this perspective, it even leaves room for a little grace and celebration with and for our people. So things didn't go perfectly, BUT I gave it my very best and she did too. I did what I could to the best of my ability with great preparation and effort..and while that _______ didn't go quite as I had planned, it still was good. What's not to be proud of then? 

So who's with me? May we strive for excellence over perfection and live a life of doing things well.  

xoxo
Jes

 “Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people. Remember that the Lord will give you an inheritance as your reward, and that the Master you are serving is Christ.” Colossians‬ ‭3:23-24‬ 

"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen." 1 Peter 4:8-11

I JUST Wanted To...

I just wanted to say, good morning! 

I just think this would be a good idea. 

Dear Lord, I just want to ask you for...

JUST.  A polite sentiment that I've been using over and over again. One not to intrude or interfere, but just to ask or just to say something. 

I read an article yesterday from Propel Women,  an organization dedicated to helping women internalize a leadership identity and find their purpose, passion and potential, titled "Three Words that Undermine Your Message" and the word "JUST" was top on the list! The author writes,

"This word is usually used as an explanation, but it comes across as weak, apologetic, and whiny. Sometimes we use “just” to make our idea seem small. That way, if someone doesn’t like it or doesn’t agree with us, we can brush it off without being hurt. The truth is that you have to believe what you’re saying more than anyone else does. You have to own it, not minimize it! Simply remove this word and the sentence becomes stronger, more direct, and confident." 

It hit me like a ton of bricks. The word "just" isn't bad nor wrong, but the way that I've been using it has been undermining the way I approach things, especially in my prayer life. Dear Lord, I just want to ask you to show me your way in this. It almost sounds as if I'm bothering God with my request.

Dear God, the Mighty Creator of the Universe, the Redeemer, the Giver of Life, the One Who Is and Can do all things, can you pretty please just help me? It's as if I'm saying, "I'm coming to ask for your help, but I'm unsure if you will or if you care or if this is even worthy of asking." 

Anyone? Or is it just me? 

I don't think this a matter of faith, but a preconditioning, politeness of the heart. We never want to inconvenience those around us, but sometimes when we approach God, we feel the same way. I'm afraid there might be an underlying, unnoticed tone in our hearts in which we feel this time our request may just inconvenience Him.

I believe God is who He says He is in the Bible. I believe that He is the same God who parted the Red Sea, shut the mouths of lions, saved guys from a fiery furnace, healed the sick and made a way for us to have eternal life with Him in heaven through Jesus Christ. I believe the stories of the Bible and I believe that He can do the same things today in 2016 as He did back then. 

And I've witnessed modern day miracles: babies being born healthy without a medical explanation, broken relationships and hearts being restored, sick being healed, addictions broken, people doing a complete one-eighty in their lives and seeing strength and courage given when something's hard to face. Yet, I still sometimes go to God as if I'm bothering Him. 

The truth of it, God cares about it all. He says in the Bible that He does (Psalm 139). Even the littlest as I've seen it in my own life. I've asked for the smallest of things - from needing to be on time for a meeting and hitting all green lights, to finding a new place to live as time is running out, to finding lost car keys and finishing a race when I didn't think I'd have enough strength to go the distance.  To be the biggest of things - healing of a broken heartache, finding strength to get up each morning and do life after the loss of my Momma, loving again without hinderance, bitterness, or fear after a divorce, and having the freedom to laugh, find joy and enjoy life after all the hardship in life. Those are big, y'all! 

I'm sure you have stories of the same. 

So let's be BOLD. Not just bold sometimes or occasionally, but always. Let's remember Who we are asking. Let's be the ones who are filled with gratitude and ask unapologetically and who love fiercely. Let's be confident in God's promises, His great love and His truth in the Bible. 

No more #justsaying. Instead #truth #boldness #confidence #compassion #love 

I don't just love y'all. I really do. 
xoxo
Jes

P.S. Are you in the wait of life right now or afraid to ask? This article is a great reminder as we pray and ask God. 

"Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need." Hebrews 4:12

"Call to Me, and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things, which you do not know." Jeremiah 33:3

"Many, Lord my God, are the wonders you have done, the things you planned for us. None can compare with you; were I to speak and tell of your deed, they would be too many to declare. Psalm 40:5