Achieving those Goals

What happens when I don't make my year-end goal?

Once again, I'm fighting perfectionism. With 2017 quickly approaching, it looks like I'm going to be just shy of my 2016 SMART goal to write twenty-four blog posts in a year. The hardest part is that I'm trying to decide what to do about it. Am I going to try to sneak in four more posts? Or am I going to blow it off and beat myself up for not making my goal?

As a perfectionist, I'm battling the fight of perfect. I can't help, but to fight emotions and feelings of the desire for accomplishment and the success of "checking that off my list". Yet as a girl leading a busy life, my perspective is slightly and slowly changing and instead of the "what I didn't do" I want to take a moment to look at what I did do.

I did manage to write eighteen blog posts this year since February 2016. I also committed to paying for my own website and domain. I wrote my first-ever eulogy, thousands of emails, a five-day prayer devotion booklet for my girlfriends, countless carefully crafted Instagram posts, many thank you cards, three presentations, prepared one breakout session, eleven meeting agendas, weeks and weeks of Bible study introductions, and four Evite invitations. (Maybe that last one was a stretch, but I've been writing!) I'm not going to meet my SMART goal for writing, but I do have a lot to look at when I take a step back from staring that goal in the face. It's all about perspective, right?

What about you? What's got you hung up? Do you need a little room for perspective?

I don't want to make excuses for not setting and meeting goals; I want to make excuses for all of us fighting (and losing to!) perfectionism. We ain't perfect here and we wasn't ever gonna be.

 But, what if we were a little nicer to ourselves in celebrating even our smallest victories?

It's the motive and heart behind the goal. Why am I setting this goal? What am I trying to achieve? What can be learned? How can this better benefit those around me? Is this going to make a positive difference?

Those are the real questions that make our goals worth achieving. As I continue to write, I'll keep setting goals, work next year to make my twenty-four and keep working towards that big goal of writing a book one day! The reason why I write in the first place is to encourage and inspire others with God's love. Am I doing that? I sure hope so. 

Let's cheer on on each other as we set goals and work to accomplish them. Let's be there to rally and encourage when they don't match up. Help me to commit to persevere and cheer on the journey, not just the destination and the goals, but the people too!

Cheers y'all!

xoxo

Jes

“I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.” Philippians 3:14-16  ‭

Leaning into the Wait

Last week I posted about change. My goodness, we love it and hate it all at the same time, but what happens when we are ready for things to change, but they're not. What do we do in the wait?

As I am trying my hardest not to rush this season of my life - it's fun and exciting, has its challenges, but comes with just-about-all a girl could wish for - yet there's still a part of me that is ready to move onto the next thing.

Have you been there? If I could only make it through this day. Or if only that sweet baby could talk or walk already. If only I could move into that new home or get married or have children, or get a new job, new car, new pay raise, or get to Friday, if only I could get a new ______ or to the next _____. If only.  

If only we didn't wish our life away.  

Waiting is part of life! Just as much as change is, so is waiting. 

When we start wishing ourselves to the next season (or even to the end of the week!), we begin missing things. We miss the joy. We miss moments and laughter or memories and lessons. We miss the opportunity that's only found in the "right now" in these circumstances or this situation.  

If we aren't careful our beautiful, bright world will quickly become dull because of all that wishin' and wonderin'. By all means, dream. Dream of the days, the sweet life and the goals, but let's not miss what is right in front of us right now. 

Lord, remind us that this season of life has purpose. It's special and put here for a reason. May we not get in too big of a hurry that miss the opportunity to stop and enjoy today.

Let's pledge to stand strong, be present and take it all in during this season of life because the next one will be here before we know it!

xoxo

Jes

“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.” Matthew‬ ‭6:34‬ ‭(NLT)‬‬ 

“Have you never heard? Have you never understood? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” Isaiah‬ ‭40:28-31‬ ‭(NLT‬‬)

Dear Change, We Don't Always Love You.

Why is change so hard?

May I let that question sit with you for a minute? Tomorrow I’ll have the opportunity to speak to a group of women at the Leadership Education Seminar. My topic is “Turnover & Transition” an eloquent title defined by change as we ask, “How do we lead through the change?”.  

Change is all around us. It’s in our personal life, a new season of life, at home or in the workplace, it’s in our relationships and community; it’s happening. Kids are taking their first steps, friends moving into new homes, graduates are starting college, parents are aging and friends are getting married and/or having babies. As I’ve heard them say in the South, “we’re all in the thick of it together.”

Whether it’s anticipated or unexpected, it’s the new. And we make the choice to either embrace it or resist it. What will you do? What’s changing in your life? What do you wish you could or could not change?

Most of the time my head screams embrace it, but my heart whispers wait, don’t. Other times, I can’t wait for things to change. (I’ll talk more about living in the “wait” in my next post.) Regardless of how the change comes, I’m praying that we’ll have the courage to welcome it. We want to be compassionate about the new, lean into the growth and opportunity with a smile and continue to remember that each season has a reason and a purpose.

Welcome, my friend. Change and new adventure awaits. What will you chose to do with it?

xoxo
Jes

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Deuteronomy 31:6

If we're in a season of change, may we simply readjust our sails.  

#SmallisBigChallenge

Over the past couple weeks, I've been writing and posting from the Heart Magazine #SmallisBigChallenge. Each day is associated with a word and a challenge to find grace, love and appreciation in the smallest.  

I've loved it! It's made me take time out of my day to think about and reflect on the littles (and bigs!) of my life. It's also encouraged me to write more and share my story via social media and the magazine's #ShareYourHeart campaign. (You can find my entires on Instagram at @jdelinde and the Heart Magazine's original post here.) 

@theheartmag #SmallisBigChallenge Day 15: Treat. 

Today's biggest treat is that my Dad turned sixty! My brothers and I are thrilled about being home to celebrate his birthday. He is the coolest dude and the best Dad a girl could ask for! After a tough year, celebrating is something that we love to do even more. We've each learned that life together is a gift.

I've also had the treat of having some amazing girlfriends in my life. These girls (pictured below) along with my cousin, Sarah Nicole have done a lot of life together since we were kids. From elementary school through college and soon into our thirties, we have lived full lives. From junior high cheerleading, Spring Lake church camp, first loves, bad break-ups and teenage independence, to degrees, careers, cross-country moves, many girls nights out, weddings and motherhood; even family heartache, disappointment and divorce--we have seen God's sweet bond of friendship continue to weave stories and memories in our lives.

Tara, Victoria, Rachel, Dad, me and Amber in May 2006. *See this post to fill you in on my little white dress.

Tuesday evening, we received terrible and unexpected news that our childhood friend, Tara had passed away leaving behind three sweet kids and a best friend for a husband. Words are beyond the tender heartache of the last few days as tears can only speak of life's goodness and pain all same. 

Ironically that morning, I had publicly posted that through God's loving grace and mercy, I could still smile after hurt and heartache.

Three days later and in a much different heart condition, I still hold onto that promise because of this simple truth: "I believe heaven is for real. I know the Hope of heaven and the promise of Jesus Christ will heal and that God is still near."

To only share the bright smiles and happy highlights, I'd be missing out on the rest of the truth that makes it my story. Life is made up of the goods and bads, the highs and lows; success and failure, joy and pain, love and hurt. 

But I also believe life is truly fueled by love and hope and faith. I believe God's plans are so much bigger than we can imagine and that each of our lives have a greater purpose than we know.

I am so grateful for my girlfriends--those in Arkansas, California and across the country--that I get to love, laugh and "do" life with. Whether it's every day or on occasion, over text, FaceTime or phone calls, these are God's gifts; and at the end of my time, I want to have loved my friends, family and those around me freely and fiercely.

"'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all." -Alfred Lord Tennyson

Keep us all in your prayers!  

I love y'all to the moon and back.

xoxo

Jes

“No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.” Romans‬ ‭8:37-38‬ 

A Mother's Day Love

 "I love you to the moon and back" my Mom would always write me in her notes.

And I believed every word. My Momma loved us three kids and I am so thankful that we knew love at an early age. My parents have been amazing examples of God's great love and I hope that the boys and I continue to carry on that legacy. 

Today for Mother's Day I will remember and celebrate with a tender heart. I will thank the Lord for giving me a good Momma and wish that she was still here, but I will also remember the Hope that still stands strong in my heart. God didn't leave me by myself--He gave me a DeDe, a Memaw, a great Daddy, two brothers, and four sweet, sweet aunts that I love--and big family and a whole lot of girlfriends, neighbors and ladies from church who love and mentor me.

And God didn't leave you by yourself either. He loves you. In the Bible, Jeremiah 31:3 says that "And the Lord says, I have loved you with an everlasting love and have drawn you in with a loving kindness." 

So today as we recognize our Mommas, Memaw, aunts, and best friends take a moment to thank them for their love. We need them and they are so special. Also take a moment to pray for those whose hearts are tender today. Send a text and remind them as they wait, they hurt, or they wish that God is not done writing their story. And that you love them and so does He. 

I love y'all to the moon and back!

xoxo

Jes

 “Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD will personally go ahead of you. He will be with you; he will neither fail you nor abandon you.” Deuteronomy‬ ‭31:8‬ ‭

 “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the LORD. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.” Jeremiah‬ ‭29:11-13‬